InFocus: Queer and Disabled Story by PWDA member Haley
InFocus: Queer & Disabled is a digital storytelling campaign led by PWDA, centring the voices and lived experiences of LGBTQIA+ people with disability.
The Joy of Being Known
Beyond the fact that many of my disabled friends are often queer, there’s one clear common thread I have noticed between the disability community and the queer community. The wider world can be an exhausting, or at times a terrifying place to venture into when you’re queer, or disabled, or both. But when I have been in disabled spaces, or queer spaces, there’s an unbridled joy of putting down your mask and knowing the people you’re around will accept you exactly as you are.
My experiences of queer spaces
I grew up in Florida and lived in both Miami and Orlando before I moved to Australia when I was 22. Adolescence is an uncomfortable experience. You’re trying to figure out who you are. But in the case of navigating a queer identity, it can be difficult to figure out when it’s safe to let people know all the parts of you.
Some of the best memories from my teens and early twenties were based in queer spaces. As a teen, I attended a regular social group for LGBTQIA+ young people run by Pridelines in Miami. When I moved to Orlando to go to university, I was able to take part in a scholarship and mentorship program for LBT women run by Aqua Foundation for Women. I also spent some of my days off when I wasn’t in class volunteering at Zebra Coalition, a centre for LGBTQIA+ young people living in Florida, many of whom were experiencing mental health issues or homelessness.
I remember feeling a sense of belonging in all of these spaces. But I also remember being moved to tears sometimes when people would enter these spaces and share how these were the only spaces where they could freely be themselves. No matter the challenges with family or the judgment within the world, these queer spaces I belonged to were places that were joyful with authenticity.
Unmasking in disabled spaces
One of my favourite things about disabled spaces is that there is an understanding of differences, varying needs, and varying abilities. This makes it easy to navigate, self advocate, and move past barriers and straight into existing without any masks or limitations in place.
Some of my most meaningful friendships are with other disabled people. We can skip past the worries of discrimination or accessibility issues and straight into conversations about who we are, what interests us, and enjoying the time we get to spend together.
The similarities between my two communities
I have always felt welcomed by both the disability community and the queer community. It may be a coincidence, but I have also noticed in queer spaces how many people seem to be disabled, and in disabled spaces how many people seem to be queer. I don’t think it’s a coincidence, though. I think it’s the result of finding communities where being your full self is valued. Finding spaces like these means you can be honest with yourself, and honest with others, about who you are.
There’s a deep joy in being known as you truly are. In a world where people can often feel lonely even when surrounded by people, finding your place in both the queer community and disabled community often leads to rich friendships and a sense of community even if you only have a couple of friends.
Find more InFocus: Queer and Disabled stories: